gonepausal
    You haven't gone crazy....you've gonepausal!



MANOPAUSE

Why is it that the male of our species is asked to be so understanding of ladies going through the dreaded "Change?"  Are we exempt from the pressures and ravages of "father time?"  I don't think so! 

I cannot be the only man who wakes up in a pool of sweat in the middle of the night.  Explain that to me.  Especially when the AC is blowing at hurricane speed directly at me.  I have the doctor prescribing a myriad of creams and hormones to slather on my arm and leg to replace what I no longer produce naturally.  Add to that the uncertainty of a world that caters to the young and active.  I can handle that, but if you insist that I put all my problems on the back burner so that I can empathize with and support all my hormonal female counterparts, I have to draw the line. 

"How do these pants look on me?" is usually the opening and thinly disguised prelude to a major emotional breakdown. 

"You look great" is interpreted as "Stop placating me so you can go back to Sportscenter. "

"The black ones are better on you honey" is met with, "So they do make me look fat!" 

Don't get me wrong , we who like to think that we are somewhat evolved recognize what you are going through but we have to be able to answer you without getting our heads bit off.

How about us single middle aged guys.  We are really in the dark.  It is hard enough to try to understand and suport someone who you've been living with for a number of years.  It is impossible to do so with that "new lady" you just met.  What do you do when you take a seemingly "normal" lady to dinner and she begins sobbing because you inadvertantly ordered the same thing her ex-husband, who adandoned her last year, ordered at the very same restaurant?  Ever try to figure out why sending the wrong flowers is tantamount to a slap in the face?  We didn't know Orchids were the flower that your last boyfriend who left you for a younger women sent you on a regular basis.

You know what ladies; it's just as tough for us.  We mean well but sometimes we screw up.  A little sympathy in our direction will go a long way toward you getting the things you want.  Life AIN'T easy and unfortunately  it gets harder not easier as we get older.  "Youth truly is wasted on the young!" 

The good news is most of us are going to keep on trying because we really cannot live without you.  So take heart ladies.  We are here and no matter how inept we may seem, we are going to keep on trying to please you!

- anonymous in Palm Desert, CA





The Men's Room: "Manopause"